Ladies' Night and such things

So last night was Ladies' Night at InterVarsity. We all went to Hillsong and were welcomed by the men. Then they proceeded to show us live skits and taped skits and feed us dessert. Each skit was about the effect that the women in IV have had on the campus and the men in IV. Each skit was based (loosely) on a Bible verse that they would read to us at the end of the skit. During one of the taped skits they played a clip of "Here's To The Night" by Eve 6. I listened to that a long time ago and hadn't heard it in a long time. It has stuck in my mind, especially one line. "Tomorrow's gonna come too soon." That's what it seems like. The end of the year is fast approaching and soon all the seniors I have gotten to know and love this past year will be graduating and leaving. There is one guy in particular who I will really miss. He acts like a big brother to me. I really like having a big brother here, but at the same time I wish he would see me as an equal and maybe something more. But that is in God's hands. Why is it so hard to trust God? He has taken such good care of me all my life and yet the second I should trust him I grab the reins and try to take charge, although I never was in charge to begin with. I tend to forget that small detail a lot. And yet, it is so freeing. I don't have to worry about anything. God will take care of me. And yet, I still worry. Like this summer, for instance, I have no idea where I should work and I want to work at a place that I will enjoy working, but I don't know where to apply. And I can't seem to balance the motivation to go apply for jobs and trusting God. But it's almost like I have to be worried to be motivated to go find a job. It just doesn't make sense. But I guess I shouldn't be looking for a place that I would like, but rather a place that God can work best through me. I am so self-centered that it is hard to remember that it is all about God and not me. But it's getting late and I have a headache so I'm off to bed...